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The Sunny D: May 2013

Friday, May 31, 2013

My Dating Pool





Your Dating Pool AKA The Gaggle

Gaggle: A flock of geese not in flight. This is an adorable picture of ducks, not geese. However, ducks travel the same way as geese on ground and that is in a pack. There is a new theory to dating in the "post-dating" world. It is that each woman has her own gaggle of men. I know I have a gaggle of women too for that matter. There are certain women I call to complain too, shop with, go to the movies with etc. The same principals applies to your gaggle of men.

This gaggle of men may be your work out buddy, your co-worker, the hottie, your ex boyfriend you are still friends with, the ego booster, the helper, the late night relationship problem solver,..the list goes on and on and on. The point of this theory is that your emotional needs are being met by a myriad of men, not just one. 

On some level I think this is true because I look around at the men in my life, or my gaggle. The men I choose to spend time with and what wonderful qualities each one of them has. They are all unique and special to me. As I think about each one of these friends in my life, I am just grateful and happy that I DO have them. I guess what I have realized is that this "gaggle" is also my dating pool. There are possibilities that I never really thought about with each of these dapper dudes. I am getting to know them and their qualities good and bad. I am learning about me and what I like and don't like about myself. I am learning that there is joy in having a gaggle. 

Enlarging the Dating Pool....or Your Gaggle

As a busy, dedicated teacher and Momma I do not have a lot of time to devote to building my gaggle. I just don't. I do however feel like the happier I am, the more men I draw to me. They just appear, and for me that is the way it has to be. I don't have hours to spend at a singles activities each week. I have a few precious hours without my kids and believe me if I am spending them with you, it means your pretty special. 

Now. There is another way to enlarge your dating pool. It is to join an online singles site. I belong to one that is affiliated with my church. I have a love hate relationship with it but I have met a lot of nice people and my dating pool has grown. Not many of these men get invited into the gaggle. I just don't mess around with men I am not interested in. It takes time for me to let men into my inner circle, and this is part of the learning and growth that is taking place in my life. I have learned who I can trust and who I can't. Some of the men in my gaggle I have known for YEARS and it is only through observation of their actions with others, how they conduct themselves, and how they treat me that I allow them in. It is a trust thing for me, I am not so trusting with my emotions or my children for that matter. 

Priorities...............
Here is what I know to be true. You have to put the important things first, or there is no use in having a gaggle in the first place. The point of enlarging your dating pool or having a gaggle for that matter is to eventually find a person that you are happy being with AND that you know YOU can make happy. We all know faith with out works is dead, having a gaggle is part of the process in finding a future spouse. I firmly believe that the most joy a person can feel is when they are in a safe, loving, kind marriage. That is the plan, to have joy to be happy in a FAMILY. But what if you already have a family? Children of your own? The answer is, the gaggle is always secondary. Always. I guess UNTIL you find the golden goose that is. 

That leads me to tonight. I had a date set up. He called last night to confirm and then realized that the event we were going to go to wasn't until NEXT weekend so we rescheduled. As, I lay in bed in the quiet knitting together some things in my mind I had a feeling that my daughter needed me. I felt strongly that I needed to take her on a "date." That she desperately needed some one on one time with me. I was invited to go out with a member in my gaggle which I politely refused, and then I had the opportunity to go out with another man which I took a rain check. 

So my dating pool was narrowed considerably tonight...
and it was worth it, because she needed me and we had a lot of fun together. We watched Epic and then for dinner she wanted a pretzel. I think this is an important lesson, put the important things first. You see, I really believe that the right goose for me will be a man who values the important things but I FIRST have to do those things myself. 

I do not know if there has been a happier time in my life. I know what is important, I have wonderful relationships. I am balanced, I know what I need to do to stay at the top of my game. I am so lucky! I love my job, I get excited when I sit down to plan out a unit. Ideas will flood into my mind of what I should teach and how and that is so GRATIFYING! I love it! I love my children, we have been through some REALLY hard things but guess what??? We did it. You know, I don't know what the future holds for me. I do hope that it is to be in a family again someday. I don't know if the gaggle thing actually works to get to the end product of a family. In the mean time, I will be happy with what I have and I will continue to believe that something wonderful is about to happen. 

If not, at least I have Louie. He adores me. 





Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Those Jalapenos are HOOOOTTTT

The Fam Bam Memorial Day

This post is going to be a mish masher of schtuff because I have all of these thoughts and feelings whirling around in my head and I can't nail it down to one specific topic. So here it goes. 

I just made this new dish called Chicken Curry in a Hurry. It is a crock pot dinner and it is all ready to go for tomorrow. It had jalapenos in it and as I de-seeded the nasty bugger its hot, spicy, jalapeno juices got all over my fingers and they ARE BURNING! I mean BURN-ING. Then I ate a handful of cherries and now my LIPS are burning. DANG. 

I hope that dinner is yum in the tum because if not and I am dealing with burning fingers I am going to be MAD. Speaking of burning..................


Unasian Daddy Long Legs and I bought a Groupon a year ago or something like that. She is just CRAZY about Groupons and finds all kinds of fun stuff for us to do. This was a glass blowing class we took this weekend with a couple of great guys we dragged along as our "dates." 

My "date" was formerly known as Ricardo, he didn't approve of the name Ricardo in fact was quite particular about it so I have given him a new name or SIGN.....


Okay. I can't call him the Prince sign name. Mostly because I am not a PRINCE fan and its ugly so here is a picture of my neighbor, I mean, "date."

Isn't my date the cutest? He even let me borrow his sweater. The truth is....I won't ever post pictures of dates but I do have a new and APPROVED..not improved name for Ricardo/Formerly known as the Prince sign. Mr. Rogers. Who doesn't love Mr. Rogers? 

On Sunday I was at my Mom and Dad's house and helped my Mom with some computer stuff. We were laying around in my sisters old room and I looked up on her shelf where a plethora of books were just hanging out waiting for someone to get their hands on them again. The first book I finished in a bout an hour, it was called, He's Just Not That Into You. It was DEPRESSING, OK. I don't think anyone should read that book ever. Then there are some Deseret Book published books that are so CHEESY awesome. Seriously, I am almost done with the second one and I am learning a lot about BYU culture, which is eye opening odd since I didn't go there. 


Monday we went to a baseball game. It was super fun. Then the BBQ at my parents which is pictured above. I realized that I really need a new swimsuit or two and am on the hunt for one since I am going somewhere this summer I will NEED one. Not telling where yet though. 


I love my neighborhood, this was after a three mile run today. I love so much when trees look like they are reaching toward each other like they are trying to hold hands. That is one of my favorite things, along with the golden hour and the grapevines that are getting full.

Oh man I just love that. Maybe I just love vegetation over walkways. That must be it. 

Playing Red Rover with my class

There are only two and a half days of school left. It is a bittersweet thing for me. There are all of these little people that you love and adore so much. I love my class. They are darling, what a gift it is to be their teacher. There is so much to do, everything has to come down off of the walls, and the walls have to be wiped down. All of the books have to be accounted for and taken to one spot in the school. The kids desks have to be cleaned out and scoured and all of the legs have to be made the same size. Now, for some reason this little detail is what is killing me. Number ONE, I am not mechanical. At all. So what should be a very easy job will most likely take me five times as long. This is the clean up part, but then you have to do testing on the kids and wrap up all of your grading. On top of teaching meaningful lessons each day. 

How do I help the non teacher understand the gravity of this week? Let's see. Basically it is like deep cleaning every closet, cupboard, and room in your home...WHILE doing your taxes......and bills....and helping your kids with their homework.......AND it is emotional you feel a loss, like when you lose a beloved pet, WHILE planning a meaningful Relief Society Lesson with handouts FOR FIVE DAYS STRAIGHT to 30 kids. That about sums it up. 

Anyway, it is just a few harried days. I am excited for Summer. I get to be a FULL TIME MOM. Isn't that just the best thing? I can't wait. I love those two babies of mine. We are going to be doing a lot of fun stuff, and some hard work stuff, and some lazy days by the pool stuff. It makes me smile just to think of it all.

Love,
The Sunny D
XOXO

Sunday, May 26, 2013

A-HA! By George, I Think She's Got It. FINALLY.

My "Journal"
 I wouldn't say that is really a journal. It is more like a place I take notes, make lists, goals etc. I take this book to most important church meetings that I attend. I have taken notes on several Women's Conferences, Stake Conferences, General Conferences, Stake Relief Society Conferences....OK lets just say lots of conferences. 

Last weekend, I took this little notebook to yet another conference. The Huntington Beach Singles Conference. I opened my book up and I realized that I was at the end of it. Just a few precious pages left, that's all. I flipped to the front of it and realized I had started this book in 2008. The speaker at the conference talked on but I was transported in my mind's eye to 2008. The feelings, the insecurities, the confusion came rushing back to me of that time, I felt as if I wasn't even in the HB conference at all but back at BYU Women's conference. I had listed FIVE goals in the front of this book that I had made for myself at the Women's Conference. I realized that I had attained each and every one. That the lessons I have learned in the last five years have been although painful, invaluable to my personal progression and growth. I took a moment to thank Heavenly Father for my blessings and flipped to the end of the book mentally fast forwarding to the present. 

I have had a question, well not really a question but more of a "wondering" on my mind the last few months. I won't go into detail as this is a question close to my heart, and one in which I am still struggling through. However, I do want to share with you how aware Father in Heaven is of me, and by doing this I hope you, my friends will realize that He is aware of you too. Heavenly Father is one of my biggest advocates, he knows me, he loves me, he wants so much to help me, sometimes I just get in the way. As you will see. 

A few weeks ago, I began to wonder about my "wondering." I began the search to my problem the way I usually do. On my knees in prayer, asking for help and understanding. The question I have is a baffling one. In fact it is a MYSTERY. At least, to me it is. After I prayed, I felt discouraged and I reached for my scriptures. I felt I should turn to Alma 32. I couldn't at the time recall what that chapter was about, you see my memory isn't the greatest. As I began to read, I realized it was the chapter about faith. Here it is: 
There is a note in the upper right hand corner that was exactly what I needed to hear. I read until I was nodding off, I felt peaceful. I knew that I needed to have more Faith.

A funny thing happens with me, I get these great reassurances and then I start to worry again. SO by the end of the next night, I was perplexed again with the same question. I was exhausted as I had worked an extra long day. I prayed and then I reached for my scriptures. I just didn't have the energy to read that night, I felt heavy with discouragement but as I turned the page I read this:

JUST BEGIN TO BELIEVE. 
You see Heavenly Father knows me so well, he knows when my mind is so full I can't even handle reading a verse of scripture, yet he STILL tells me exactly what it is I need to hear. I felt so peaceful and I knew what I needed to do. Just begin to believe. Do you think it was a coincidence that this exact phrase was right where I needed it to be, on the night I needed it to be there? No. It is not.  The weekend was busy, and I was busy too trying to believe. 

Monday rolled around, and I have this FHE folder with lessons that are all ready to go. They are PERFECT for my family and their ages. There is a lesson, a scripture to memorize that week, and a game. Guess what the next lesson was about? Can you guess? Because of course, I was starting to lack some Faith......and doubt, and worry, then WHAM............Seriously. The next lesson in the binder.



Now, I still did not realize that Heavenly Father was giving ME a message, did I feel peace each time? Yes. Was I reminded that he was aware of me? Yes. That he knows my needs? Yes. Was I given the peace and comfort I needed to sleep? Yes. Was I still grappling with doubt? Yes. 

I tried to have more faith, I prayed for help to have more faith. I hoped for what I can not see, or understand, or do anything about....my "wondering" and I still worried and then I would hope, and then I would doubt, and then I would hope and then I went to the Huntington Beach Singles Conference. 

Where I learned a lot, AND got three dates. So that was fun. However, the dates had nothing to do with my question. I wrote in a past post that I was lucky. I wrote about a walk I went on that I was spending some quiet contemplative time, I was continually reminded how lucky I am. I counted my blessings, I was so thankful and I spent about a half an hour telling Heavenly Father that I was. I felt spiritually prepared for sacrament meeting. Where the topic was................

You guessed it. 

Faith. 

I took notes in my handy dandy notebook. I remember thinking, well this IS interesting isn't it. The topic is FAITH. When a cross reference to ALMA 32:21 was stated from the pulpit. 


Hebrews 11:1. How Faith Works. Things that are hoped for and not seen. 
And I kind of went, oh..wow, weird. This is what I have been working on all this time. Hmm, so interesting. I realized that I don't have to have all the details. It was right HERE on this page that I realized that having hope was enough. You see, as a Teacher it is my JOB to plan out the details to know exactly what we are going to do, and when, and how it will play out. As a mother it is my JOB to PLAN AHEAD. I AM A PLANNER, A DOER, A LIST MAKER, A CALENDAR FILLER. I like to know what is going on in my life. The who's, the when's and the how's. I am a thinker, I analyze. It is just who I am. SO Faith, you see is sometimes a hard thing for me to grasp because in all other aspects of my life when I plan and do things, they turn out the way I want them to. They go the way I expect. 

With FAITH, you have hope and then you do all you can do, and then..............................WHEN YOU STILL HAVE YOUR "WONDERING" , and you then try to have more hope and keep hoping, and hoping, and working, and hoping, and WAITING...................and you CAN'T FORESEE the ANSWER to what you are WONDERING ABOUT. SIGH. Doesn't that just make you feel tired. 

Anyway, It all began to make sense and THEN JUST TO MAKE SURE..............a few pages of notes later, 8 pages later to be exact. I came across this as I finished my page of notes..............


HEBREWS 11:1 Now Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

 My eyes may have literally bugged OUT of my head. It was right here that the so called nail was put in the coffin of my "wondering." It was here I FINALLY went, A-HA! Follow the arrow...."I think the Lord's telling me something." I had FIVE, kind, gentle, REMINDERS, that I had been praying for, ALL THIS TIME. It took about a MONTH for me to figure this out with help as you can obviously see. It was right here that I took this wondering, and I handed it over to Heavenly Father because I couldn't do anything about it. It was here, that the weight of it was lifted off of my shoulders. And it was here, that I knew everything would be JUST FINE, if I just kept hoping. 

Moral to this little diddy: 
1. The Lord is infinitely aware of me (and YOU) 
2. He wants to help me ( and YOU)
3. Sometimes I am REALLY, REALLY slow to catch on
4. But it is ok, because the Heavenly Father loves me and is SO patient and will just keep reminding me until I "get it" 
5. THERE ARE NO COINCIDENCES when it comes to Heavenly Father
6. I am valued, loved, and important
7. We have to ask for his help, and sometimes wrestle a bit until the answer comes full circle
8. Every little thing, will be alright. 


Happy Sunday,
The Sunny D  XOXO



Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Huntington Beach--I have ALWAYS been LUCKY

 I found this five dollar bill on the floor. I asked everyone on my way to the bathroom if it was theirs and it wasn't. 
 I used it to buy a scoop of this. It was delicious. 

I have been lucky for a really long time, I have found money on the ground countless times. I won $1000.00 off of the radio once. I used to win concert tickets ALL the time.  I even won a coloring contest at Halloween time and got a VHS video of Sleepy Hollow. That was a big deal in 1982, because we had a VCR and not everybody did at the time. Hold up, I think this a moment where my son would be flabbergasted that I was alive before they INVENTED cell phones, DVD's etc. He probably doesn't even know what VHS is. Guess what, we even had an 8 track and it was awesome. He asked me the other night if I was alive before cereal was invented. He asked me, "Did you have cereal when you were little or was that not invented yet." Oh boy. Back to being lucky. 
Sunday morning I felt I needed a little space. The house we stayed in was lovely but packed with people and I was feeling a bit overwhelmed. I put on my tennis shoes and went for a walk. I saw this Juniper tree and it reminded me of a Van Gogh painting. I felt lucky to happen upon it on my Sunday morning stroll. I thought it was beautiful. It looks like it is reaching toward the sun. I was thinking about the Savior during my walk, I had some questions on my mind. I remember asking, "What is it you want me to learn today?" The answers came pouring in of what I was supposed to learn and I was glad I took some time to be still so I could be ready for those answers. 

Then as I was walking look what landed on my thumb. A lady bug. DO you know that if a lady bug lands on you it means you are lucky? Beetles have always loved my thumbs. Not kidding a june bug attached itself to my thumb when I was four. I can still feel its poky little legs clinging for dear life on my skin. It totally freaked me out. I was so happy to have this little lady bug come for a visit. I think the universe was telling me I am lucky. I can't wait for the next few months because right now, I have luck. Luck left me for a while, but its back in full swing and I love it.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Huntington Beach Highlights.......


On my way to Huntington Beach

 Day two was great. I tend to be a little anti-social. I know if you know me well you would say...WHAT? It is true. As we arrived at the beach the sheer number of people is enough to make me want to retreat home. However, I made the best of it. I enjoyed the sun soaking into my skin. The sound of the waves. I just laid down on my towel popped my headphones in and pretended I was the only one there. I did play a few games of sand volleyball, which I love. I walked to the ocean where a few of my friends were and RC taught me how to catch sand crabs, they were so gross and cool at the same time. We decided they were the cockroaches of the sea. I realized one reason why I was at this conference. I ran into another recently Mrs. who is now a Ms. This was her first conference and I think it was good that I was a friendly face and I could introduce her to my friends. It is a shock entering this world of singlehood in your 30's. Church activities are not any different than being any where else in any group in the world. She said, "I hate this it feels like high school." I tend to think it feels more like Jr. High. Those were some special years, Jr. High. The thing is I have nothing to prove to anyone there. I don't care if I am in the "cool" group, I know who I am and I am good with that. It is a good place to be. My friend and I talked, she was confused because her ex keeps telling her he wants to get back together.

Tell me about it.
I know all about that.

I told her what I knew and I am going to put a few more things here that I wish I had said.  You see her situation and mine are so incredibly similar it is scary. But then again, Satan has a plan. It is a really good one, he knows how to break up families and he doesn't have to reinvent the wheel because what he does and how he does it works. I told her to thank Heavenly Father every time he continues to break your heart. Those are tender mercies from the Lord, showing you that what you have done is the right thing. So be thankful.  I wanted to tell her the reason he keeps trying to come back again and again is because he KNOWS, his SPIRIT KNOWS that she is a bright star. She is THE BEST thing that will ever happen to him, now and in the future. No woman, however beautiful or young, or smart will EVER be her. Ever. That is why he keeps coming back because her virtue is beautiful and she was only his. Was being the key word here. He is fighting this awful internal battle between his spirit and the natural man. He just keeps letting the natural man win and he wants it all, the natural man always does. But you cannot serve two masters, and choices have consequences, and bad choices have consequences that you can't control. That is an eternal principle. I wish I had told her that she will heal, that life is so beautiful, to enjoy the peace that has been missing in her life for so long. I wish I could have told her what I learned on Sunday but it was Saturday, so I hadn't learned it yet. SO I will write about it later. Maybe.

So the beach was good. That evening they closed down Balboa Pier. It was fun. We went for a couple of hours.



I was talking to my Mom last night and she said, "Remember when you said to me, but I don't KNOW anybody." I do remember that. A few years ago I was so lonely, I didn't have friends that I could turn too. I am so grateful for my blessings. I love my friends. I am so grateful for the lessons I have learned. I have walked a long dusty road but now the road is grassy, there are trees and flowers. Birds are singing and I am so lucky. It's true. I'll tell you ALL about it in my next post.

Monday, May 20, 2013

Huntington Beach Mid-Singles Adult Conference May 2013

A few important lessons: I learned that I am white. My arm VS. my leg. Both white and my arm has a tan from bus duty. 

I have a few things I want to write about this weekend but for you curious readers here is exactly what a Singles Conference for old people looks like.

We drove in Thursday night.
Slept.
Woke up, went to the beach to run by myself. Glorious.
Went to the Getty with K1 and her boyfriend. I like him, a good choice. 
That evening the Conference people rented a Golfland type place, which we went to for an hour or so. We then went back to the house and just hung out visiting.
Saturday Morning there were classes, the beach and then that evening Balboa Pier was rented out. There was a mechanical shark named Burt, a ferris wheel, a boat ride tour of the Balboa real estate, karaoke to a live band and lots of other stuff
Sunday Morning was a wonderful church service, followed by a catered lunch and a fireside. 

DAY 1
RUN. 



The Getty. Love the Getty.

 Maybe one day I will find someone I like enough to lay on the grass and look at the sky with, isn't that so adorable. 



 I didn't realize there was another special little lady in the picture, the Getty just makes people happy see her cute little smile? It is so peaceful. 
Albrecht Durer. 


Hanging out with our favorite boys. Snuggle buggles at the house Friday night.






That pretty much sums up Day 1. 

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Who Is Knocking On Your Door?

I love this picture. I took it as my sister and I went into the Newport Temple. This little birdie has the perfect perch. 
I loved Facebook on Mother's Day. I loved reading all of my friends comments showing love for their Mom's. There was so much love, it felt like Christmas. 


Disclaimer:

I know I am not the best writer. I am not one who stresses out over what I am going to lay down on the page. So, I am aware that I make some mistakes. If I were an editor, my blog would be perfect. I am not an editor. 

I have listened and/or read Boyd K. Packer's talk, These Things I Know several times now. You can listen to it right here. It has a lot of good advice and wisdom. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeglqZtlpBA 

It has caused me to pause and think, the story of the Finches is one of the things I have pondered. 

The back windows of our home overlook a small flower garden and the woods which border a small stream. One wall of the house borders on the garden and is thickly covered with English ivy. Most years this ivy has been the nesting place for house finches. The nests in the vines are safe from foxes and raccoons and cats that are about.
One day there was a great commotion in the ivy. Desperate cries of distress came as 8 or 10 finches from the surrounding woods came to join in this cry of alarm. I soon saw the source of the commotion. A snake had slid partway down out of the ivy and hung in front of the window just long enough for me to pull it out. The middle part of the snake’s body had two bulges—clear evidence convicting it of taking two fledglings from the nest. Not in the 50 years we had lived in our home had we seen anything like that. It was a once-in-a-lifetime experience—or so we thought.
A few days later there was another commotion, this time in the vines covering our dog run. We heard the same cries of alarm, the gathering of the neighborhood finches. We knew what the predator was. A grandson climbed onto the run and pulled out another snake that was still holding on tightly to the mother bird it had caught in the nest and killed.
I said to myself, “What is going on? Is the Garden of Eden being invaded again?”
There came into my mind the warnings spoken by the prophets. We will not always be safe from the adversary’s influence, even within our own homes. We need to protect our nestlings.


It reminded me of a dream I had about a decade ago, the dream went like this. I lived in a home that had a very long hall from the living room to the front door. The floor was a honey colored travertine. In my dream I stood in the middle of the hall facing the front door. I had a feeling of fear, it was distinct. As I was looking at the door Satan walked right in. I knew who he was, I recognized him right away. He wasn't very tall maybe 5'10 or 5'11, he had dark hair, he looked like any ordinary man, I could feel his power, it was heavy, thick, and real. 

I said, Get out of my house. He said, No. I walked right up to him feeling sick with fear but with strength and I began to push him out the front door. He fought back like a toddler would when you try to buckle them in a car seat and you are totally exhausted afterwards. I was sweating, drops of sweat ran down my face and back. I finally got him out, and locked the door feeling a huge sense of relief and fatigue. I started to walk down the hall when again I felt the oppression. I turned to look at the door it was closed, but suddenly Satan appeared in my home again! Uninvited! I looked at him, I said Get out of my house! He simply said, No. I demanded again, Leave! He looked at me amused and said, No. He laughed at me. I walked over to him again with great struggle, physically forced him out the front door. I was pouring with sweat and totally exhausted. I rested for a minute against the door a sense of relief came over me. I turned to walk down the hall. Again, I turned to look at the door and as I did a vapor of smoke came under the door and into my home, the vapor materialized into Satan. Again uninvited.I said,GET OUT. He said, You cant make me leave. This time, I ran at him and pushed him with all of my might towards the door my shoulder to his chest. It was a great struggle, a battle even of who was stronger.I pushed, he pushed back. I pushed and shoved him toward the door. It felt like an arm wrestling match when you are at the end about to win but you are so tired in that moment. Or when I am at the gym nasueous after a really hard weight workout. I began to weep from exhaustion,my weeping led into sobs. I could not fight any more, I did not have an ounce of strength left in me.I looked Satan in the eye. I took a few steps back. I remembered the power of the priesthood, I raised my arm to the square and I cast him out of my house. He simply disappeared, peace flooded my home and heart and I woke up drenched in sweat, sobbing. 

To me, this is like the story of the Finches. I did not know Satan's power at the time. I do now. I have fought spiritually until I was exhausted, emotionally and physically. What I have learned is that the only way to truly beat Satan is to not rely on ourselves. We have to have the help of the Savior. We have to have Heavenly Father's Power to keep Satan out of our homes. We have to arm our homes in a blanket of Spiritual Protection that can only come from the Priesthood. I have also learned that after I have tried all I can, done all I can the Savior will ALWAYS rescue me. Every time. 


The Sunny D
XOXO



Sunday, May 12, 2013

I Made You From Scratch

I made this girl from scratch

My Mom made me from scratch


For Mother's Day, I am making this little number from scratch. My house smells delicious. 


I was thinking about my Mom today, as most of us should. I think I was a typical child. I think I was mostly nice with a few hiccups here and there. 
I was intuitive, like the time I put DAWN in the dishwasher instead of dishwashing soap because we were out. We left and when we came home there were suds flooding the kitchen.
 I was helpful, like the time I ordered KFC for our family for dinner because my Mom had been working all day and I thought it would be nice for her to come home and not cook. She wasn't that happy about it.
 I was creative, like the time my Mom had this pretty etched glass red vase with a rose in it and I broke it on accident and blamed it on my cousin who lived across town...this cousin also ate all of her chocolates that day even though she hadn't been over.
 I was thrifty, I used to clip coupons for all the stuff my Mom needed to buy at the store from the Sunday paper. I am sure that was super helpful.
 I was honest, like the time my Mom was going on a date (before she was married) and the "date" was dropping me off at Grandma's on the way there I said, "I feel sick," and then proceeded to throw up all over his truck. I bet that was the best date ever.
 I was investigative, like the time a stranger came to the front door and I snuck behind the front door to peer through the crack to see who it was..when unbeknownst to me my Mom moved the door JUST a hair and BOTH my toenails got ripped right off the nail beds by the metal door thing at the bottom of the door.
 I was motivated, because Mom pretty much had to help me with every project I ever did. 
I was a Mathematician, that is why I was in tutoring pretty much my whole childhood, teenage and college years. 
I was punctual, like the time I was out with my boyfriend and got home thirty minutes after my curfew and my Mom walked out in her pajama's, opened the door to his car and dragged me in the house by my ear. That boyfriend still loves my Mom. I wanted to crawl in a big, deep, dark hole. 
I was a winner, like the time my Mom spent HOURS helping me run for student council in 5th grade, writing a speech, making gobs of posters and hand outs..and I lost. 
Did I mention I was really good at math?? When I was a Junior in High School I got a D in Math knowing my Dad would literally kill me..okay not literally but be FURIOUS with me, probably because of all the money he was spending on tutoring. She changed my carbon copy D to a C so I could survive, best Mom moment of my life until that point. 

My Mom also let me stay home from school once in a blue moon, just by myself even if I wasn't really sick and we would get Taco Bell for lunch and rent movies. My friends came over to eat lunch at my house ALL of the time because I lived across the street from the high school she was so happy to have us. She helped me in my classes, helped me navigate enrolling for classes at ASU, gives cooking advice when I can't remember how to make that certain thing, she helped me when I had my babies and through a heart wrenching divorce. When I was informed that my ex wanted a divorce, I went to my closet and sobbed on the phone to my Mom, I don't even think she could understand what I was saying she just came and picked me up to stay at her house. She helps me when I am in a pinch, gives me love when I need it, helps me look pretty when I don't, gives me a pep talk if I am down, but most of all she reassures me that everything will be fine. 

She said to me once, little kids little problems, big kids big problems. I can't imagine what it will be like to be the parent of an adult child. I can't imagine the worry I have caused her over the last few years, the stress but I couldn't have navigated through this without her. I am so lucky to have the best Mom in the world. I am so happy to have the relationship I have with her. Life has been wonderful for me the last six months or so. I am so grateful to have a Mom to celebrate the good life with on this Mother's Day.


Love, The Sunny D 
XOXO

Thursday, May 9, 2013

The Killers

Killers Concert May 4, 2013 Tucson Arizona


You know, you forget sometimes. 

I forgot how much I love concerts, the smells, the sounds, the invading of your personal space. I know this otherwise does not sound appealing but when you are with this crowd and you all share this love for this band, for music. It is like magic, real life tangible magic. The age and gender gap do not apply at concerts. I love that.

So, it was a round about way that I came to going to this concert. First of all, who doesn't like the Killers? I think they have songs for everyone. I was talking to a friend one night, by talking I mean texting, of course. He mentioned they were coming to town and I said, "Let's GO!" I am not sure if he realized just how much of a concert nut I was. 

We left Saturday to go to the concert. It was a two hour drive to Tucson, we took the scenic route which pretty much turned out to be going through Florence. Neither of us had gone that way, it was a nice drive. The conversation was good and I liked that I didn't feel like I had to talk ALL the time. I mean, I already kind of do but there wasn't this pressure.

 I will call my friend Ricardo. I like Ricardo, he is the kind of person you would want to go on the show Amazing Race with. He is kind, calm, and has a gentle spirit about him.  He is smart and witty too. Its a good combination in a person. He doesn't make me feel uncomfortable like some men do and that is a good thing.

So we ate at a yummy Mexican food place, Guadalajara I think. They make salsa for you right there just what you like. It was kind of cool. 

Then we went to the concert, it was the usual outdoor baseball complex music festival type show. There was a whole list of bands but we arrived just before the Killers to see Cake. I had seen Cake previously and remember them being awful. They were actually AWESOME and now I am wondering if I possibly mixed them up with another band. We were at the way back, behind the crowd and we wanted to get up front and center.

My specialty. Crowd weaving. It takes a certain amount of pushiness and gumption to work your way through a crowd of concert goers that have been waiting around ALL day to hear the last and BEST band. Ricardo went first, he moseyed nicely through the crowd we stopped about 2/3 of the way up and talked for a second. I think he may have been sure we were about as far as we could go. The crowd was knitted together tightly at this point, heat rising from the vast amount of bodies. It was at this point that I took the lead. I pushed and weaved my way through the crowd, Ricardo following. I began to hit the wall about a third back from the stage. The wall is where you get the hard core people who have been there and are in battle stance, blocking any one who wishes to get through. It was at this point that I said, "My sister is up at the front we have to get to her I had to use the bathroom." I would then push my way through some would move, some I would just push aside. Now I just have to say on a technicality that wasn't a lie. I did use the bathroom at the restaurant and aren't we all brothers and sisters? We squeezed through a few more rows. We were about 1/4 of the way from the stage when we ran into this blond guy. I gave him my schpiel  about the bathroom..sister..blah blah. He looked at me like I am not a dummy lady, but I said look, she is younger than me and I can't leave her there alone. (you know, my poor sister) He reluctantly let me by, but then saw Ricardo and said, "Uh-uh no way is the tall guy going," and closed the gap between me, Ricardo and the perfect spot. Two rows of people had already filled in the space between me and Ricardo so I said, "Sorry, he's my husband, he's coming." I grabbed Ricardo's arm and pulled him up. I have to laugh because this was pretty clever on the spot thinking if you ask me and because Ricardo is quite tall. I would say certainly the tallest in the radius of people around us. 

We settled in, the excitement was building the crew began to prep the set and then The Killers arrived. It was AWESOME. The crowd danced and swayed, there was confetti. Can you beat any activity that has confetti? I think not. There was crowd surfing, I really wanted to crowd surf. I contemplated it actually, like did a real PRO/CON list thing in my head. I decided that I better not. I was #1 too old, #2 have young children that need a fully functioning mother (my cousin was dropped and broke her arm crowd surfing once)  #3 a role model, #4 Didn't want weird people touching me. It was at this moment that a shirtless, long haired, slick with sweat and body odor man walked right by me. I scooted back quick, because I didn't want him to touch me and noticed how the rest of the row did the same. 

I think that is the professional way of maneuvering through a crowd. You want people to move take of your shirt, be stinky and sweaty. Note taken. 

The concert was amazing, Brandon Flowers..amazing. I think Dustland Fairytale was my favorite song he preformed. I am not sure it was all so good. It was a great show, so much fun. 

It helped me remember, what I had forgotten about the magic of a rock show. 








Saturday, May 4, 2013

Crazy Content

I love this peanut and her little red cowboy boots. I could just eat her up.

Every week Aydan has Kumon which is a Japanese way to teach mathematics. So I get one whole hour with this sweet girl every Tuesday night. We usually just go to McDonald's which is right by the tutoring spot and do her homework and then she plays for a while. There isn't a sweeter girl. This day we went to her favorite restaurant Pei Wei. When I wasn't looking she filled the WHOLE front pocket of her backpack up with fortune cookies. Its true. I about died when I realized this three hours later when little plastic wrappers kept popping up around the house. You can see she loves fortune cookies. She has one in her hand. 

Their Father has been out of town this week so I had the kids and did all the running around. My support system also crumbled around me because UADLL left to go to Women's Conference. I just have to say that I love Women's Conference. I haven't been in a long while but it is a wonderful place to be with friends and learn and grow. So UADLL usually has my kids in the mornings and afternoons while I am teaching school. She is a HUGE help, and Yogi my other BFF drives my kids AND picks them up everyday for me. Do you know how blessed I am for these women to be in my life. SO blessed. Anyway, it was a lot of juggling this week. I felt like a person literally balancing 17 spinning plates on sticks and a few plates dropped. It was okay though, I had a melt down one morning after the kids were dropped off and I was on my way to work. I cried my little heart out to my Mom on the phone who then stepped in with some sound no nonsense advice. I put my big girl shoes back on and put my nose back to the grindstone. 

My Mom then babysat my kids that Thursday night. I went on a most enjoyable date where we made these boats and raced them down the canal. Seriously, it was fun and I don't think I've been on a date that creative in ages. Props to the date. It was just what I needed to be outside, laughing and having fun.  When I returned home my kids were bathed and in bed. We decided to just spend the night over there so the kids could have a normal routine. 

I guess what I have realized is how lucky I am. When things are hard and I am over scheduled, tired, and worn out I am constantly reminded how much love and friendship and support I have from my family and friends. You can't beat having a great Mom, that is FOR SURE. 

It is Saturday morning, I went for a jog ran into a friend sat and visited for a minute. I am doing laundry and my house is clean. I am getting my car washed AND then to the salon to have my Sasquatch-Cro Magnon man eyebrows waxed, I think with a manicure to follow. My hands look sad, like they work all week long with no relief in sight. I have fun plans tonight with a friend so yet again I am shown that I can do hard things, and the hard things come to an end they don't last forever. If I can just remember that in the moment.

Today I am happy. Grateful. Lucky. Content. Peaceful.

XOXO The Sunny D